Welcome to the final instalment of the Felix trilogy.
Well I was well and truly pissed that my rendezvous with Felix had ended a disaster. I wasn't naive enough to think a full time relationship could have evolved from meeting him but it would have been nice to have a bit of fun. I just could not get his body out of my head..so toned, so smooth, so absolutely gorgeous.
I had to pull myself together and move on.
The time had come for me to go on Gaydar and start chatting again.
I logged on and headed for the chat room, said my usual hello and started reading what the other guys were talking about.
About ten minutes had passed when I received a private chat request. It was Felix. Should I accept the invite or decline?
Of course I accepted. It was Felix...remember..lovely body and all that!
We chatted for a while and then he mentioned that night and how it had ended. I felt I had to defend myself and advised if he looked at my profile he would see that it stated I was versatile. He didn't have to. He had already looked.
I told him he would have been the first guy I had been top with but that did not mean it would have been rubbish. He apologised as did I. If I had not said what I said, maybe the night would have ended perfectly.
We continued with the conversation and then he said that he did like me. Was he trying to say that we should try again? I wasn't sure. Maybe he just meant as a friend. Then he suggested we meet up again. Straight away I said yes.
It was agreed that we would go to the cinema again and then shopping. Shopping..not back to his place? This confirmed to me that he just meant as friends. I wanted it to be a meet where both of us ended up naked again but I'd said yes so couldn't get out of it now.
The day arrived and I made my way to Bradford. Once again Felix was a little late. We made our way to the cinema and purchased tickets for Haunting in Connecticut.
Now it is a well known fact that I very rarely watch scary movies due to the fact that they do actually scare me. The only jumps I require are those of the sexual kind thank you very much.
There are only two instances where I would go to the cinema to watch one. The first is if I have watched the trailer and actually thought it didn't look too scary. The other is if I fancy a guy and know that guy likes scary films.
Felix had mentioned during our very first chat that he had watched a scary movie that night so I presumed he was a horror fan. I fancied Felix and thus my decision to watch a scary movie was made.
How wrong could I have been? About 40 minutes into the film Felix turned to me to say he had to go.
I asked him why and replied because the film was too scary. I looked at him and said I thought you loved scary movies? He hated scary films. I let out a little laugh and told him I didn' like them either and had only chosen this one because I thought he did. I also told him there was no way we were leaving now. It was scary but I was enjoying the film. There was also the little fact that I had purchased the tickets and no way was that money going to be wasted. He laughed and we continued to watch it.
When it had finished, we left the cinema. Both of us were a little shaken but it had been an enjoyable film.
Then Felix asked if I would kike to go back to his place? That was not what I was expecting him to say.
Had I impressed him by going to see a film I would not normally watch just because I thought he did? Were we going to try and rekindle what we had failed to do previously? There was only one way to find out.
We made our way to his place and I have to admit, I was rather excited. The vision of that lovely body of his had already entered my mind and I was well and truly turned on.
What happened next certainly exstinguished that flame I was holding for him.
I was sat on his bed and Felix started to talk. He told me how he had just broken up with his boyfriend who, like me, was an older man. His ex had been in touch the day before and wanted for them both to give things another go. Felix had said yes. Was I hearing correctly here? There I was thinking we were going to sleep together when in actual fact, there was no way that was going to happen. Foolish is an understatement on how I was feeling. There was more.
He mentioned how his ex only liked to sleep with him when he was dressed a certain way. I did the right thing and put how I was feeling to one side and started acting like a friend.
"There's nothing wrong with dressing up to please your boyfriend " I said.
That wasn't what he was getting at. "There is something I haven't told you" he said.
I asked what was it and he was a little dubious to tell me. That lasted for a few minutes and then he told me.
"I'm a drag queen" he blurted out, to which I replied "Oh".
Ladies and gentlemen...I give you Roberta or to be precise..Roberta Rocks!
Shocked is probably not good enough a word to describe how his announcement made me feel. Of course, I tried not to show this and continued chatting. His ex only liked to sleep with him when he was Roberta and they went out on the town only when he was her too.
I asked if he had a photos of her. He was a bit unsure whether to let me look or not but in the end he did.
Now I am not one to judge people on their choices but the way I look at it, if you want to be a woman in your spare time, you should at least try and look like a woman. Felix didn't. When dressed as Roberta, you could still see that she was a man. Maybe it was the wig, the clothes, the make-up or something else but whatever it was..it wasn't pleasing to the eye.
I lied and said she was beautiful then continued to ask about the ex that was soon to become boyfriend again.
The were going to meet up the next day and sort things out. Felix then put his Roberta head on and said he had better buy her something expensive. "A girl likes to be treated" he said.
I suggested we make our way into town as I had to get home for a certain time. He agreed so off we went.
Surreal is the only way I can describe what happened next.
The first shop we went to was a wig shop. Felix was looking for a new wig for Roberta.
"I'm a drag queen darling and looking for some new hair" he said to the assistant.
I stood there watching him try wigs on and then found myself picking wigs out with him too. This was turning into the strangest day ever.
We left the shop empty handed and made our way to River Island. Thank you I thought to myself. A shop with men's clothes. Was Felix looking for men's clothes? Of course he wasn't. We were there for Roberta.
First thing we looked at was ladies underwear followed by skirts, dresses, blouses and finally onto shoes.
He tried several pairs on but none of them he liked.
He seemed to be getting a lot pf pleasure out of announcing he was a drag queen at every given opportunity which just made me feel more and more uncomfortable.
If I'd been there with him dressed as Roberta, I don't think I'd have minded but here we were, two guys looking at ladies clothing and shoes and him trying them on. We left River Island empty handed too.
Several shops later, it was time for me to depart for Leeds.
Felix had bought the grand total of nothing for Roberta and I was just desperate to get home.
We said our goodbyes an I wished him well with his ex.
The train departed with me on it and all I could do was reflect on what had occurred that day. The only thing I could do was put it all down to experience.
Before I finish, I just need to say i have nothing against men who want to be drag queens. I actually find some of them very very funny and some glamorous. There has even been one or two I have fancied.
My problem that day was that I was thrown in at the deep end. Maybe when we left to go shopping, I should have known we would be looking for Roberta but I didn't and it made me feel uneasy.
If I'd known from the start, then I would have handled the whole situation a lot better.
Felix and I kept in contact for a few months after that by text and gaydar and we met up one more time to do an aerobics class.
The last time i heard from him was in 2010.
I really hope he is happy whether it be as Felix or Roberta and even now I sometimes think of that body and how close I came to making love to him....only sometimes mind you!
Until next Tuesday..I bid thee farewell.